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Be Confident! How To Be The Strongest Version Of You

Vivian KELLY
by Vivian KELLY Published on October 23, 2014

Many of us have moments of insecurity and low self-esteem but don't let it get you down! Confidence isn't as difficult as people make it out to be. There are TONS of pick-me-ups for an instant confidence boost, like wearing red, learning something new and fighting off negative thoughts. Want to build your confidence? Here's how to be the strongest and most gorgeous version of yourself...

Do you withdraw when you meet someone new? Does the thought of standing in front of an audience make you sick? Do you often find yourself self-conscious in bed? Everyone has their self-doubts, and no one is perfect.

A new poll by Feminesse Powder Room revealed that one way women help boost their confidence is by FAKING it. You know the old adage, 'Fake it till you make it'. The poll found that two thirds of women fake confidence, with 6 out of 10 of them feeling more confident as a result.

The poll also revealed that 7 out of 10 women faked confidence at work and 25 percent acted more confident in the bedroom (than they actually felt). Building confidence takes time but it's in NO way unachievable. So we've compiled a list of feel-good tips that actually work! If you wanna know how to be more confident, start with these tips and tricks!

1. Smile more

It's such a small gesture, with so much benefit. Smiling gives off positive energy helping to change your attitude and help influence people around you. Psychologically smiling makes you feel happier, more optimistic and as a result - more confident over all. So remember, SMILE.

2. Conquer procrastination

We're all guilty of it. But what we don't realise is how much more confident we feel when we're on top of things. Don't let your never ending To Do List run your life, take control and start getting things ticked off. Once you stop thinking and just start DOING you'll find yourself feeling way more relaxed, happier and more confident. Go on, get it done.

3. Fake it

Fight off those racing thoughts and trick yourself confident - it really works!

The Powder Room’s resident psychologist, Jo Hemmings, says, “Try acting confident even if you’re nervous underneath. It might feel weird at first but over time you’ll discover it works and becomes second nature."

Stand tall and think 'I'm confident'. Yep, it's a cliche, but we can guarantee you it works.

4. Indulge yourself in knowledge

Often when we don't feel confident it's because we're lacking preparation. Perhaps you have an exam or a presentation to give - the more you practice the more and more confident you'll begin to feel.

The best thing to do is gain knowledge so study and practice, bit by bit. If you set just 30 minutes aside everyday, in time, you'll believe in yourself more. Easy as pie.

5. Write it down

We always bully ourselves into thinking that what we do isn't good enough. But what we forget, is what we actually achieve each day and every day (but never give ourselves credit for).

Here's how to challenge this."Throughout your day, take a few moments to note down all the good stuff that you have achieved and then read it back just before you go to sleep.

"?This powers you up overnight for a positive and confident wake-up the next day," says Jannine, founder and managing mirector of leadership and business coaching consultancy Inspirit Learning Partners. See, sometimes all you gotta do is take note!

6. Positive affirmations

To be confident, you NEED to believe in yourself. So why not become your own biggest fan?

Life and personal development coach, Léa Vendrami says to use positive affirmations to achieve this. "Stick notes on your laptop, have reminders on your phone or write them on your mirror with lipstick. Make sure you are being reminded about how amazing, fabulous and talented you are as often as possible!"

And be creative with it too. Promise yourself to post something positive and inspiring every morning when you wake up. Whether it be on Twitter, Instagram, Facebook, whatever, not only will you help motivate yourself but you'll also be helping others feel good too.

7. Look after your skin

Sometimes a bit of TLC is all you need. Who doesn't want clear, gorgeous skin?

Spa owner and Skincare Expert at Klapp Cosmetics, Luma Salem agrees, she says, "Looking after your skin is a vital element when it comes to boosting confidence and what better way to treat your skin (and yourself) than having a facial!"

Try making your own DIY facial for a quick, affordable and all natural treatment. Who needs the spa, when you've got your kitchen pantry, right? Alternatively ?Klapp Cosmetics offer a range of targeted facials to help your skin look the best it can be. Check out some of their fabulous range here.

8. Take a shower

There's nothing better than the feeling you get after a long steamy shower. Lose yourself, forget about your worries and just ChiIll Out. You'll be smelling fresh, your hair won't be greasy and you shaved - hey, there's not much that can beat that. If you have time, take a bath!

9. Wear sexy underwear

Whether you need a confidence boost in, or out of the bedroom wearing sexy lingerie can make all the difference.

"Don’t save your sexy underwear only for special occasions," says Léa. Wear it anytime, any day. "If you want to feel like a goddess treat yourself like one." Real sexiness is true confidence!

10. The power of red

If your confidence is low, wearing red can have an immediate effect on the way you feel.

"Red is associated with strength and determination as well as passion and love. Wearing red bras and panties will give you a sense of power, make you more confident and maybe even a little naughty," says Léa.

Don't limit it to underwear! Slash on a shade of scarlet red lipstick or slip on a red cute day dress. It's bound to make you feel that bit bolder.

11. Work out

You hear this all the time but until you do it yourself you won't realise the advantages. The rush of endorphins you get will help keep you energetic and happy while giving you a blast in confidence every time single time.

Think about it. Not only will you be shedding the pounds and toning up but the feeling a good workout gives you is pretty damn rewarding too.

12. Tell yourself 'You Are Enough'

Have you ever felt like you're not good enough, pretty enough or successful enough? The most common cause of a lack of confidence and low self-esteem stem from inner feelings of not being 'enough'.

Therapist and best-selling author, Marisa Peer says, "In order to boost confidence you need to tackle this inner feeling. When we don't feel 'enough' we tend to look for anything that will temporarily make us feel enough, such as excess eating, excess shopping, hoarding. Anything that we do to an excess is because we feel 'less than' so we need more.

But the quickest way to cure this is to write, " 'I am enough' on your mirror in big, lipstick letters and remind yourself every day that you are enough. The more you say it, the more you'll feel it."

You're good enough!

For more easy tips on boosting your confidence check out Marisa's book, Ultimate Confidence!

13. Challenge yourself

You know that poetry class you've been meaning to join? Or how much you love Italian? NOW is the time to do it. Challenge yourself to do something that you've never done before and join a new class. You'll find that empowering yourself through a new endeavour will give you confidence you never thought you had. It's never too late.

14. Volunteer

Helping someone improve their lives will help you feel good too. And when you're meeting new people, gaining new skills and trying new things it can help you stay connected, boost self-esteem and confidence.

So why not partner up with your local community, join a charity or volunteer at your local charity shop. They're ALWAYS looking for a helping hand.

15. Praise yourself

An important step in confidence building is changing the way you think. You've probably been critical of yourself for as long as you can remember. Try to be approving instead.

To do it, Jannine says, "Take a moment to remember a recent achievement that made you feel great. Remember how you felt at the time and make this feeling stronger - use it to 'power you up' in preparation for big event or important date." Give yourself validation and watch your confidence soar!

16. Love yourself

The key to confidence is self-love.

Léa says, "Self-love means loving and accepting ourselves unconditionally, exactly the way we are and where we are, including our flaws and imperfections."

As long as you're happy and content with yourself there's no reason why you shouldn't feel any less than amazing!

How do you boost your confidence? Tweet us @wewomenca

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by Vivian KELLY

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