When it's him who doesn't want to...
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Effect of pregnancy on a man's sex drive
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Effect of pregnancy on a man's sex drive


It's not complicated. When Mandy fell pregnant, I started to notice that I wasn't as interested in sex as I was before, but I thought it was her changing body shape that bothered me, along with the fear of hurting her or our baby. She gave birth 3 months ago, got her gorgeous body back almost instantly, and yet I still don't want to make love to her, even less so than when she was pregnant. I'm deeply in love with her still and I'm not interested in other women. But I've started resorting to porn films and the like.

> Expert's opinion
Aaron faces two contradicting images: pregnant Mandy, which proves his manhood; and motherly Mandy, which forces the couple to face up their responsibilities and also makes Mandy appear untouchable. Sometimes equating these two feminine roles with the previous role of lover is not always easy for a man to deal with. Aaron is still interested in sex because he's finding refuge through virtual means, even though that's not the solution.

> The (getting some) action plan
More than ever, the keywords are communication and affection. After pregnancy, a woman's erogenous zones can change so it's the ideal time to explore and discover other sensual spots. Take small steps to build back the desire - start with just kissing and each night make the commitment to go one step, and only one step, further. No cheating! Also Aaron's got to stop watching porn or Mandy will eventually feel she's being unfavourably compared to porn actresses and may suffer her own loss of libido.


Also on wewomen:
> Men and sex: the ultimate quiz
>12 Steps to the Big O
> Banned in the bedroom: the things we can't learn to love




 


Love & Sex Editor
2012/01/14
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