However, you don't necessarily want to spy on your kid. The more you forbid something to your child, the more likely they are to want to experience it. Kids will be kids after all. Goldman proposes another solution. "What's more important than forbidding it or spying on your kid is staying very connected with your kid as they reach the ages of seven, eight, nine, ten and enter their tweens, when they start to become more aware of the broader world around them," she suggests.
"Ideally, the most protective thing parents can do is say 'I don't want you looking at this stuff, if you look at it, let's talk about it. I'm not going to punish you for coming across it. I'd rather you come to me with questions about sex than seek all this out."
In other words, uncomfortable as it may be, you need to talk to your kids about taboo subjects like sex and pornography, so that they can be aware and stay on their guard while online. They need to feel comfortable coming to you with their mistakes.
"If the kid feels that the consequence of telling the parent is worse than the consequence of being cyber-bullied, then you've got a problem," Goldman says.