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Katherine: "I don't have maternal instincts"

 
Katherine: "I don't have maternal instincts"

Katherine is 36 and is a lawyer.
For a while people have started asking me when I'm going to have kids. It makes me want to scream "I don't want them!" but also it makes me think "Am I normal?" I've never been interested in having kids. I can't stand babies crying, it makes me panic and worried. Mybe I just don't have any maternal instincts.
At the beginning I told myself I wasn't ready and that there would come a time when it felt right. But the longer time goes on, the more I feel as if I'm not going to have children in my life. If I need to be a mother to be complete, should I force myself to have kids just to be like everyone else? I don't think so. Everyone says motherhood is a unique experience but I experience unique things every day. I just want to live an exciting life from day to day and discover new things rather than burden myself with a baby and get into a routine. We only get one chance at life and I'm going to make the most of it, without children. I'll probably regret it one day - maybe that'll make me feel more normal! 

Our psychotherapist says: 
There have always been women who don't want children, but nowadays they're not afraid of saying so. The choice that contraception has brought us is very precious. Having a child when you don't want one can cause problems for the child and for your relationship. Katherine says that babies' cries make her worried, and whatever the reasons for that, it doesn't sound typical of someone who doesn't want a child. 




  
  


Sarah Horrocks
2009/03/14
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